Life Saver

It feels like weve been out at sea

So back and forth thats how its seems

 and when I want to talk

you say to me

That if its meant to be, it will be

So crazy in this thing we call love

The love that we got that we just cant give up

I' m reaching out for you tell me

out here in the water and I

Im overboard and I need your love

Pull me up

I cant swim on my own

Its to much

Feels like Im drowning without your love

So throw yourself out to me

My life saver

Life saver

 life saver

My life saver

Life saver

 life saver oh wow

Never understand you when you say

Wanting me to met you half way.

Felt like I was doing my part

Get bringing your coming up short

Funny how these thing change

Cause now I see

Your only taking and not given any more

So what will I do? (So what will I do?)

Cause I still love you. (Still love you Baby)

Youre the only one who can save me

Its supposed to be some give and take I know.

worst live from M.C (Mariah Carey)

Panting With Sorrow

Dorothy:

             Bravado I conquered thy yahoo!

             Yammering thy love considered martry amor.

              Bravo to you!

              Thy vitiating action irritates my unconcious mind.

                We declare scheme, binds us as one.

                You are like a rival to me.

                You hit me a rivet, I beg not.

                 Give me atleast as punch so I can breathe.

                  Punk, you often thought of me.

                  Fond of having of no ending war.

                  Mine is love, love full of sorrow.

                  Fair justice is what I protest.

                  Why can't you love me back?

                  You think it's odd?

                  That's all what I've been BEGGING from you.

                  Please do feel me.

                  You never see me being lax.

                   Peepy lady my mates thought of me.

                   Even to endure penury - no minding it.

                   As long I'm with your broaded shoulder, then I'm merry.

                  When will you love me?

                  My precious reddish pounding heart is keep waiting.

                  When will it be? tell me!?

                   I'm certain to willingly wait you.

                   Don't wait till,

                   My hair turns to gray;

                   'Till the raven turns white;

                   ' Till I'm done reading the thickest book I had.

                    Even everything turns amazingly different.

                    I will and I will and will never get tired of waiting.

                    Fix that huge heart with love.

                    I'm waiting and i will keep waiting.

                   I cried sorrowfully every moment I'm with you.

                   I long to hug and touch your body so badly.

                  You defile me and I cried.

                  Why? could'nt you share that love to me?

                  Refit our broken love like Fujiyama Mountain, so dearly to see.

                  Beautiful and a masterpiece.

                  Refrain it.

                 Without your love, I'm panting with sorrow.

                Love me like honey, never get rot.

                Drink me as if I'm the best wine on the temple.

                Shower me that love and make me holy.

                Like olive oil so smooth and lovely.

                My unfading love will never change.

                For you are my life no one can snatch.

                I'm all yours and you are all mine.

                Let's make love and cherish every bit of this martyr love.

                Show that you  love me too.

                Uncover that exquisite love you have intended FOR me.

                Make me your diamond so precious and a gold that never fades.

                Just do it and I will be merry.

                Mourn it was be.

                Fact it was be.

                Merry I was be.

                Unsatisfied craving!

                You know how and what it was be?

Sept.6, 1869
Madrid, Spain
Green Mansion
11:30PM


Victor (speaking Spanish):  

Antes de dejar este mundo maravilloso de la plena miseria.
Permítanme darles la oportunidad pronunciar esta sensación de temblor que he estado guardando dentro de mi corazón.
Supongo que usted estará contento de oír esto y pido que te quedes hermosa como tú siempre estás conmigo.


(Before leaving this wonderful full of misery world. Let me give a chance to utter this trembling feeling I have been keeping inside my heart. I suppose you'll be glad hearing this and beg you to stay beautiful as you are always to me.)

Dorothy:

You know that I love you so much.
Never I defile you and I will always carry this vow `till death do we part.

Victor:

I will never leave you with sorrow in your heart again.
I can't afford of losing you as you will always stay here in my heart.
I make sure to give you everything that I may have left.
I'm apologizing for what I've done.
For letting you suffer for loving me so much.
How could I've been so naive.
You thought that I never felt your martyr love?
You were all wrong.
I love you since the first day I have met you.
I wish I could turn back time.
I know it's never too late to refrain our intimate love story.
Though I'm extremely broken externally but I am not that weak to let you feel  my love.
And my heart will always be yours and yours will always be mine.
I love you  Dorothy.
Promise me to take good care of our offspring.
 I'll bring  this love in heaven for it is eternally meant for us.
Thank you for your unfading love.
Gracias and Te amo my darling Dorothy.

Dorothy:

Lord I'm begging with all my heart to please not to take him away from me.
This is all what I've been asking for.
Bring him back and I promise to love him even  more.

Victor:

My darling Dorothy!
Stop crying! It's our destiny so let's just be it.
Our love is inseparable.
A love full of pride for I am proud and blessed to have you in my life.
No regrets at all.
I will miss you darling Dorothy.

Dorothy:

I cried and kissed him intimately.
Never forget my love for he knows my heart passionately.
I want to be with him now.
I'm old and I'm tired.
I want to rest with him.
Lord take me away and feel your love, an everlasting love.
Like what I had encountered with Victor.
I'm panting sorrowfully in the present so dont let me suffer.
GET ME!!! I'm begging!
I made my six children grew with good conduct.
I made everything you want me to be.
All I want now is to rest, to rest with you and with Victor my love.


                                     


                                                  ........................................To be Continued.........................................
                                                        

                                                  





               

FELIMON

   Inside of me is what not others sees outside of me. What I have is what they don't have. I'm good they're not. I'm loved and love more. I can let you in but if hurting is your motive, then better get lost. You have no space here in my heart forevermore. Who are you anyway? You are just a mess. You're a no good person. Better yet leave me and find someone who can satisfy your selfish craving desires.

   One person told me once that he sees potentials in me to be a writer. a compliment I should've never be forgotten. An inspiration indeed. I'm not really into writing since then. But now BOOM! I'm craving it and pushing myself even more.  Some may like it others wont. If they will put unlawful derogatory feedbacks about my article then be it. Opinions are welcome but make sure it won't bite me and especially no hitting below the belt. It is also considered as huge part of an article for it will help you attest your ability. Negative comments sometimes help you recognize on things you thought was been very odd. Nevertheless, it's still in me ho will explore my inner being to what I really what to become in my life. Only me and my creator knows what's best to become. A combinations of two makes a trash into a masterpiece. (It means that if you have God in your life you will never be a vagabond and can eventually be a person full of potentials.)

   I hate palying. I hate faking me so think what is best for you for tomorrow you're dead. Have me for who I am but never love and comfort me for who I am not. I'm sick and tired of your allibis. Just please stay away from me and die. You hurt me that much. I cried and think of revenge but God told me "not now my son". My time is still coming. Be prepared of no ending huge war. A battle that you lose. for this war is mine. i will stab and throw you to a river full of fire and I'll laugh like a devil of no ending happiness.  You deserved more than this. You are cruel. I defile you. You ruin my life. Go and never return you damn moron. Baid you goodbye and wish you a luck.

- This is felimon's story before he became a successful writer. - 
- Experiences which will teach us to be more concern to ourselves and awareness to people feelings. -

 

Sound of Pride

Who would have thought of something you wouldn't expect to happen? Am I really good? I just can't tell how happy I am hearing those compliments from close mates. If I am that excellent it,  then I should improve it more.I couldn't believe it that there are people who can appreciate a simple work like what I did. Are they telling the truth? or they are just trying to encourage me so that i could improve what they thought is meant for me. Well, if thats their intentions, then that is actually indeed a huge pride in my part. Most of the time I tend to make myself more isolated.I Just don't like to communicate to people who I'm not at ease of talking. Maybe I am just afraid of what might they will think of me. Is it a self-pity? what do you think?You think so? Then why?  For all you know I like talking but don't know how. I like to entertain people but still dont know how. Why I'm acting this way? Is there something wrong in me? I just put it all in a dream, a possible dream. So I set a pen and paper and do write what all i have in mind. That's the only way I could make them appreciate the real me. Apparently there is no other way. I'm begging with all my heart to please offer your genuine heart to help me find solutions to all of this.

LOVE LOVE LOVE

Sometimes I have to let go of someone who matters of me.
Not because I wan to but because i have to.
Because I know it's the right thing to do.
I must remember that I can't force anyone to love me.
I can't beg someone to stay when he wants to leave and
be with somone else.

This is waht love is all about.

However, the end of love is not the end of life.
It should be the begining of understanding that love leaves for a reason,
but never leaves without a "LESSONS".

love is everywhere. It's for you to search for it.
You're the one making it. So finds love while you still can.
Just remember that love is how true you are not how much love you have.

A New Mate

“We are friends and I do like to pass the day with you in serious and inconsequential chatter. I wouldn't mind washing up beside you, dusting beside you, reading the back half of the paper while you read the front. We are friends and I would miss you, do miss you and think of you very often.”

I never thought of something better before than what I feel inside now. When there are times that I have someone to meet up all I can get is hurt. They often ignore me. It's truly hard to accept but i'ts the reality of life. Sometimes in life all we need is to just hang on to what is real. What I mean is to just be happy and believe in ourselves that we're here living with a purpose in life. Never try to hurt someone and for me that is the best present you could ever had. I am just so merry to know that not all people I meet would just dump me in a corner and leave me without even noticing. 

 So to make this article more interesting , just let me share with you an experience. A something  I could proudly share to other people. It was so rainy evening when I have to meet this two person I know from a networking site. I really dont know them personally. I don't even know how they look and act like. Rain was pouring heavily but I didn't mind it. I'll have to meet them up. So I did. When I'm almost approaching them I kind of shaking and trembling for I'm not use of meeting people. In short im shy. But the thing here was very amazing because they like me and and so do I. They even treat me to a food trip. I dunno y. Maybe it's a sign that they indeed like me as me. We talk a lot seems like experiences and something else. We even talk nasty thing. I know that you knew what i mean.  Hoping that this experience would give some lessons to live up. Let's just be happy. Happines is everywhere. It's for you to search for it. You're the one making it.

I hope that these two new friends of mine will last for a lifetime. If they would let me prove them my worth. Then, I'll prove it. I'm a good friend too, so theres nothing to be scared of. Just dont fake yourself to someone you are not. They are genuinely good and nicer than I've ever thought.  I never thought that they would treat me that good. They let me feel the true essence of a true friend.
Guys just dont forget me. Let's have some more bonding some other time. I'll never forget this experience. One of the best to cherish in life. A treasure to kept. And a friendship that last. A one of a kind....Though I only meet them just an hour ago, but I can really feel their sencerity in life.

 “I miss you when something really good happens, because you are the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you are the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry because i know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you most when i lay awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with eachother;for those were some of the best times of my life.”

NAKA-KAMIS NAMAN!!!!- - HAHAIZ--

NAMIS KO TULOY HAISKUL LIFE KO...
IKAW DIN NO???

Living in The Light

Since you are God's children, you must try to be like him. Your life must be controlled by love, just as Christ love us and gave his life for us as a sweet-smelling offering and sacrifice that pleases God. Since you are God's people, it is not right that any matters of sexual immorality or indecency or greed should even mentioned among you. Nor is it fitting for you to use language which is obscene, profane or vulgar. Rather you should give thanks to God. You may be sure that no one who is immortal, indecent, or greedy  (for greed is form of idolatry) will ever receive a share in the knigdom of Christ and of God. Do not let anyone deceive you with foolish words; it is because of these very things that God's anger will come upon those who do not obey him. So have nothing at all to do with such people. You yourselves used to be in the darkness, but since you have become the Lord's people, you are in the light that brings a rich harvest of every kind of goodness, rightneousness, and truth. Try to learn what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the worthless things that people do, things that belongs to the darkness. Instead, bring them out to the light. ( It is too shameful even to talk about the things they do in secret.) And when all things are brought out to the light, then their true nature is clearly revealed; for anthing that is clearly revealed becomes light. That is why it is said, "WAKE UP, SLEEPER AND RISE FROM DEATH , AND CHRIST WILL SHINE ON YOU". So be careful how you live. Don't live like ignorant people. Make good use of every opportunity you have, because these are vil days. Don't be fools, then, but try to find out what the Lord's wats you to do. Do not get drunk with wine, which will only ruin you; instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with the words of psalms, hymns and psalms to the Lord with praise in your hearts. In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, always give thanks for everything to God the Father.

                                                                                        -The Holy Bible-

Truly A Fact

" You are all power. You are all wisdom.
  You are all intelligence. You are perfection.
  You are magnificence. you are the creator,
  and you are creating the creation of you in this planet. "

                                                           - RHONEA BYME -

"  In life, there are lots of people watching our next move,
   desperately waiting us to fail and even praying for us to give up.
   But don't mind them. It just doubles the fun of living and surviving.
   Let's keep in mind that problems are things we don't need to
   scared of. They could lead to breakthroughs and great discoveries.
   See life as an adventure and enjoy every moment of it. "

" When you start caring about yourself,
   You start loving someone. But when you
   start caring about others, somebody starting loving you. "

                                                            - SHAKESPEARE -

" A lot of us have built dreams with people we hoped
  could be with us forever. Only to wake up in the world of reality
  that thing's permanent in this world. People stay and leave. Life is a cycle
  of finding and losing, of making and breaking, of living and dying. That's what reality is.

" Hurt me with TRUTHS,
  but never comfort me with LIES. "

" Happy persons don;t have the best in life Perhaps,
  They're just good in making the best of everything
  that life brings along their way. "

" Value everything you presently have,
  for someday you threw away, might be
  the very thing you could miss when it
  already belongs to someone else. "

" There are things that you don't want to think of',
  But you can't even forget it. There are things that
  you don't want to continue, but you are afraid ti end it.
  It's just like, you don't want to expect anything,
  but you're still willing to wait. "

" Sometimes it's not enough that a lesson is explained to you.
  Sometimes you have to go through experience and make
  a mistake before you learn what life is trying to teach you. "

" Kindness is not an inherited trait,
  it is a behavior learned. "

" I made the world believe that I'm happy.
  Strong as fighter and a survivor. But how
  long will I have to act like a perfect happy
  person if deep inside I'm totally broken. "

" Sometimes people choose to leave
  not because of some selfish reason, but
  They just know that things will get worse
  if they stay. "

" In life, you will never know what

  you've been missing untill it arrives.
 And you will never know what
 you've got until it's missing. "

" The greatest courage on earth
  is to bear defeat without losing heart.
  Tenderness and kindness are not sign
  of weakness and despair, but manifestation
  of strength and resolution. "

" We've learned how to destroy, but no to create;
  how to to waste, but not to build; how to kill men,
  but not how to save them; how to die, but seldome to live. "

" It is good to have an end to journey toward;
  but  it is the journey that matters, in the end. "
  Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth livng,
  and your belief will help create the fact. "



 

I'm exquisitely Good

You see it all in my smile.
You hear it all in my laugh.
The way I walk, you hear me talk.
And know I'm no longer sad.
I got no reason to smile more now than I've ever had.
I open up my eyes and realize that nothing's quite that bad.
I've got a different approach to dealing with emotion.
Keeping control of my boat, while drifting on this ocean.
Keeping my head to the sky, keeping tears out of my eyes.
Unless happiness be the reason that I decide to cry.
And life's too short to dwell on all that's wrong.
Stand up now, stand up now and I promise not before long.


You'll be feeling better today.
Much better today, much better today.
So much better.
You're feeling better today.
Much better today, much better today.
Much better today.
You're feeling better today.
Much better today, much better today.
So much better.
You're feeling better today.
Much better today, much better today.
You'll be so much better.

I know about down and out.
I know about when it gets tough.
Losing my fight, can't see the light.
And you just wanna give up.
I know about being depressed.
By needing someone to love.
I also know by standing up and saying enough is enough.

I feel like if I try, I could fly away right now.

All because I've finally found my smile.

FIRST LOVE

Sometimes I wanna give up.
Sometimes I wanna forget our love.
Sometimnes I forgot to look upon.
Sometimes I tend to forget my first love.

He's there when I'm weak.
He still loves me even I often defile Him.
His love is so great.
He is my first love.

He carry a heart that never HURTS.
He carry a smile that never FADES.
He carry a touch that never HURT.
He always carry a love that never BREAKS

I love Him for whatever he's giving me.
He held his hands when I'm in trouble.
He shed His blood to wipe out all the sins.
He cleanses and purifies us.

He knows me a lot.
His love is unconditional.
His aoverwhelming gratitude is power
He is power.

I'm sad when He's away.
Let's not seperate ways.
I'll hold you 'till I can.
I'll hug you and cry.

You change me and I thank you.
You sealed me and I'm secured.
Your sweet scolding give me learnings.
You taught me and it's wisdom.
You care me and I'm satisfied.
You never forsake me and I'm blessed.
You love me and I'm loved.

I long to touch Him.
I long to hug Him.
I long to talk him.
I long to dine  and drink wine with Him.

I wish we could go malling.
I wish we could laugh together
I wish we could share something in common.
I wish sometimes I can sleep in his shoulder.
But I made it by fiath.

His love to me is everlasting hapiness.
I love Him more.
He's my only love.
My frst love is Him.
ALWAYS.

-DON'T YOU KNOW?

WHY DID THEY SAY THAT ASIAN COUNTRIES ARE THE POOREST IN THE WORLD?

Even though they have a lot of resources, World's richest resources.

-REASONS WHY?-

• 
  
  Worshiping many Gods
• 
  
  False Religion
• 
  
  Know nothing the true God - Jesus Christ
• 
  
  Using images, Statues, And Temples
• 
  
  Greediness - Rich ASIANS are not helping poor asians.
• 
  
  Practicing religion but do not believe God.

JOHN 4:24

God is Spirit, And Holy  by the power of his Spirit can people worship Him as really is.

CONSTANT CHANGE

I change because of God.
I change because its wonderful and awesome.
I change because of "DADDY ALVIN".
I change because I'm certain to it.


I'm thankful to my second family.
I'm thankful to everyone who help me out.


When you change, everything changes.
People will start judging you.
They'll hate.
They'll defile and condemn you.
They'll forget you; the worst thing.


I change for the best.
I change because it's benefecial to me.
I change for more challenges in life.
I change because i like it.




I change not to impress people.
I change no to boast.
I change not to be guilty.
I change because of humility.


I change to think a better future.
I change for the vision.
I change to win lost souls.
I change to be someone to look up to.


Change is the only permanent thing in Earth.
Hard it may seems.
A process which needs a lof of patience and perseverance.
Something to be proud of.
To change everything about you is amazing.


I'm amazed to what i'm getting now.
Sorry to them whose been hurt by my words and actions.
Happiness is what i'm getting.
So change before it's too late.

LIFELINE

PAST TENSE
( Thinking it would teach me how i make my life at its's best. )

When i look at my life way back then all i can say is "AMAZING". I've been through a lot of sufferings in life. I always wanted to divert it to something i could be proud of someday. It may sounds very awkward knowing that even now I'm still prisoned to what i had been and hu i had been in the past.

Being still prisoned of my past wouldn't give strength. All im getting is misery and condemnation. I don't even know if im being blessed or not at all. I am enthusiastic enough to be a negative thinker. I'm always into positive side. If   it's for the best then i'll go for it. It it's not helping me at all better stop it. Simplicity is what i'm into.  For i know that there is really beauty in it. But sometimes people might misunderstood your action and words. They're not sensitive enough to feel what you're feeling inside. So all i can do is just let them judge me. I dont CARE..It doesn't MATTER.

PSYCHOLOGICALLY REALM
( Thinking it sometimes it'll give me WARNING. )

I'm quite yet very sensitive and a typical lad.  How would i put myself in a situation without even hurting other people? I ask this question to myself many times. Hoping that someday i'll find what's the real thing happening in my life. People might not like you beacause of how you acted toward them. No one CARES. It doen't bother me at all atleast i'm just being true to who i really am. I can't express myself vocally (not a vocal person). I can only do it in a written way. I love to talk to strangers even i don't know them personally.

PREDICAMENT
( Thinking it would help me fprget eveything. )

I tried to kill myself.
I'm very childish.
I wanna forget my past.
I'm very reckless handling important things.
I tried to run away from home.
I tried to find myself by my own.
I cursed my family especially my father.
I don't want being sorrounded by my father.
I just don't like the whole him.
I'm looking for something that can fill in that emptiness.
I never felt I'm being loved by the people who i thought would not defile me.
I am sorry to myself knowing how hard their treatment to me.
Are they against me?
VERY stubborn,  a blacksheep, and a no good person.

RESOLUTION OF SINGULARITIES
( I'm liking this in the present. )

I find myself more interesting. I need to improve it even more. I love myself now.
I can say that I am now a matured person, intellectually speaking. I'm now change into someone i'm not use to before.
I am now treating my past as the best teacher for it helps me strenghten my desire to screech a thing. I can't really conclude that i'm more responsible. 50 percent change , I guess. Not bad i supposed.
Running away to something isn't helping at all. It'll give you conflicts.

I  forgive my father for all he had done to me. I miss him. I love him even more. I dont have the right to curse him bercause without him i wouldn't be this HANDSOME as i am today. ( ANY REACTION )
I'm proud to what he'd been accomplished, big or small. We're not totally close but i get him and i dont want people judge him. He's not really that sweet. But it doesn't mean he doesn't love us. We are created differently and unique in many ways. Needless to share this but i never got a chance to say that i love him personally. Atleast now here in this blog i can let you guys know how i love my father and how big it may be. BE proud of your father no matter what.

I know myself better than those who know me personally. But sometimes i feel the emptiness inside my heart. So i keep searching solution or alternative to atleast to  lessen this urge. I just dont know about it. I'm still figuring it out.

I don't consider myself as someone i dont deserve to be. God created me for a special purpose and that is to win souls and share His words. I thought if people will criticize you that would mean they hate you. When i knew it, they'll just helping you.
 I should've to love them. CARE them all the time.  FORGIVE THEM AND FORGET ALL THE HURT THEY'VE DONE.

                 " These changes in me wouldn't possible if without the lord guidance."

-Something to cherish Forever-

WHEN I'M WEAK  

( There are song that can really make you CRY AND SAD 

when  you hear them. B

ut it's actually 

not the songs 

that makes you cry. I

ts' the people and things behind it. )

WHEN I'M WEAK 

I was alone,

then no one cares

and theres a voice saying;

be strong

Then the wind blows

into my heart

i close my eyes

i feel the warmth,

flowing inside of me

it reminds me of you:

so, hold me tightly

as you always makes me smile

coz i dont wanna lose

a friend

the love

you shared,

you always

care for me.

you are my treasure

that will always burried

inside my heart

sky is always blue

stars are shinning bright

dry my tears;

coz i wont hide it anymore

you are the

joy of my heart

This is a POEM composed by my friend hope you like it guys. She made it from the bottom of her heart. Mind you guys, I really like it and I'm even more inspired by it..It's so amazing to know that there is someone out there appriciating your woth as their friend. I just wanna say thank you for this girl whose always helping me when I'm in need. Way back then, we're not so close till one certain situation where we're facing same scenario. Thats when I appriciate her as a Good person. Some will judge her because of her geekness but that's not what is the real thing about her. 

She's intellegent but kind of coward in terms of how she will maintain good grades. Nevertheless she's amazing, an authentic person and a very loving one. although I sometimes hate her moods but still i undestand it for the sake of our friendship. I like her not because we're friends but because of her whole being of who she realy are and of what we have been through. Who would've thought that she has this wonderful gift to me. I just can't understand it. Well, maybe that's the spirit of friendship. It will help you improve yourself especially emotional aspect...JUST WANNA SAY THANK YOU TO HER FOR HER EFFORTS AND I APPRECIATE ALL SHE DID. Thanks for the friendship.

_Should I BE PROUD?_

"Everytime we hear something about money, we really thought that it's the solution of everything. It's partly correct but there are some that cannot be solve by money. some are rich by birth because of their family background, but most of them are not happy. They feel empty even they have wealth. They are looking for something that can make them happy. Generally speaking most are prone to drug addiction but not all. Even those in need. Anyways, I'll be tackling more about how we can survive in every trials we had been in life. As i experienced it all I can say is lets hold on to God. We need to find things will help us. Seems like having a stayble job or atleast a minimum salary. We can survive through this but we cannot make it possible to happen if we are just waiting for a miracle. we need to move. Put it into action. It's like having faith without action for it was death. So in my part I never deny the fact that I'm one of those whose been suffering from any scarcity. For me to still be happy I need to help myself. Pursue something which can help me. Find a job to finance my needs. Job hunting nowadays is very hard. For you to find it you need to be patient and be determined. Never give up. Keep going."
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It was a sunny afternoon when I started to prepare myself for job hunting. As I
expected most of them didn’t give me a chance to be part of their company. Its okay! Being neglected is actually part of growing up as individual. It will give you learning and lessons to take on. After Labor Day (MAY 12, 2010) a job fair was open, conducted by the DOLE (Department of Labor and Employment) held at the mall. We are only given five companies to apply."Maam can i ask something,can't we make it more than five? I asked. She said "NO". So I started searching those companies that are interested in me. There are a lot of options to choose to. But I choose the best that's really suites my capabilities.

When i went back inside the mall I am so amazed to what I saw. There are many hopeful whose been very eager and desperate for a new job. Some tried to just try their luck. Let just faith decide the outcome "BAHALA NA" as what most people termed it. I am proud too that I did The same thing. I just try my luck. I didn't expect too much from it. I just want to feel how it feels like searching for something you could've ever hard to find. I just want to evaluate myself if I can make it my own. It was very memorable and enjoyable experience I had, I suppose. Sweat been falling. Though It's very cold inside but still we're sweating, Isn't that irretating. It was actualy my first time in a job fair. I never thought it would gonna look like what I thought it would be. I just Couldn't believe how I handle myself during an inteview. I hate job interview. I have this phobia called xenophobia (stage fright). For me to improve I need to undergo process, training, and self-assesment. In line to this it's seem very inspiring to realize how you can see yourself in a situation where you can't even handle it. Up to now I seems can't resist it, can't even lessen it, I just don't know. I even find ways to atleast lessen it. I did check the internet, tried some alternative but none did work. And I consider it the reason why oftentimes I failed during interview. Well, how i wish i could broke it like a spell and can vanish it all the way. Until lifetimne, I hope. I just leave it to God.

During those time I prepared five resume and a junk one, but not junk totally. When I'm done passing them I only have one left and that is my junk resume. It came to my mind to try to pass it. When my turns came for the interview I'm shaking and trembling. When she started asking me questions I just answered her what I have in mind. So I did. Luckily i made it successfully. I texted my siblings to tell them about the good news which is my new job. I went back home with a smile in my face atleast I can made it sometimes.

DURING THE EXAM!!

I woke up early and prepared myself, and i came early at the office. We're like almost 30 hopefuls. Two sets of exam were given, Essay and Arithmetical Problem. Al pressures were in us at that time, feelin' not so okay, a mixture of something we can't even define. Afterwards a manager came out. She seems very kind of nice and very understanding. VERY CLEVER. When were done, we then scheduled to comeback after elections for our three days training without pay.

TRAINING DAY!!! ---IT'S SHOWTIME---

Same thing I did as like to my exam day. I still came early. This time was quite different because we are in outfit. We're wearing white polo shirt tucked in with black belt, black leather shoes without shoelace, and a new haircut. It was very surprising for us for it was not the same thing our manager said during conference. We are all shocked. The job seems very hard to me. It doesn't fit to me at all. It Doesn't fit to my capabilities at all. When we're halfway through, we now understood the nature of the said responsbility that was given to us. They explain what are the assignment during shift. I find it very hard and very tiring but it's another challenge to me. I need to challenge myself sometimes so that I'll have learnings and lessons to take on. I'll face it as long as I can. There are no easy job to someone whose in need. Determination and patience should always prevail. Let's Enjoy our life. God will bless us.